i feel so terrible for neglecting this blog. there are many times throughout the days and weeks when i think to myself, i really should start documenting our life better. but then time has this funny way of escaping and it's all i can manage just to make it through the day doing the bare necessities and before i know it, it has been 6 months since i last wrote anything down. oh dear.
life is pretty sweet right now. crazy. hectic. exhausting. overwhelming. stressful. but when you get right down to it, so so sweet and i just know i will look back years from now and long to go back to this time in our life, even if just for a moment.
Finn
finn is 5 and a half years old and really turning into a wonderful young boy. he is so so thoughtful - always concerned about me and his brothers. he comes up to me several times throughout the day and hugs me, kisses my belly and says, "i love you baby ollie. love you too mom." it is enough to melt me into a puddle. he is very protective of his little brothers, and not a day goes by where i question why he came to our family first. he was meant to be the biggest brother, i am positively sure of it. he is so helpful and although i know i shouldn't do this, he can totally be bribed (or guilted) into helping me with something those rare times he doesn't want to. him and sam have been sharing a room for almost a year now, and it has totally transformed and strengthened their relationship. if one of them is sick and we make them sleep in separate rooms, they both get so sad (and scared!) and beg to let the other sleep with them. they go through spurts where they even share the same bed, and it just melts my mama heart.
finn has absolutely loved kindergarten, and i have loved watching him learn and grow. he plays with the girls at recess, because he's a "grill man" (girl man...aka ladies man). it's cute but kinda scary so lately i've been encouraging him to play with boys also. every morning when i drop him off he runs to his line, then waves furiously at me saying "bye mom, i love you!" i love that he has no shame in doing this in front of all his little friends, and hope and pray he'll want to express his love like that always. fat chance, i know! but a mom can dream, eh? and then when i go to pick him up, he requests that i get out of the car and meet him. he runs to me and gives me the biggest hug as we walk back to the car together. see what i mean? this kid is a keeper.
he is still my obedient, reasonable, mild-mannered kid, and i know i'll go my whole life wondering what i did to deserve such a great kid. one story i never want to forget... a couple months ago we were having a rough day. no one was listening and i was so frustrated, i told finn and sam i wouldn't help them get ready for their naps, they'd have to go downstairs and put themselves to bed. well i went downstairs about 10 minutes later, totally expecting for them to be playing, and peeked into sam's room to find finn helping sam put his pull-up on. it was one of the sweetest, most rewarding things i've ever experienced, to see my two big boys helping each other out. times like that make the craziness of having them so close together worth it. i hope and pray that they will be there for each other and be best friends for life.
Sam
sam just turned 4 and is as crazy as ever! in fact, at his 4 year well child check yesterday i asked the doctor if it's normal that he still has temper-tantrums and hits and pushes and says mean things and the doctor laughed and said, "i sure hope so because i've got one of them at home too." that made me feel a little better. although he can be challenging at times (most of the time) sam has such a great energy and spirit about him, and everyone who knows him loves him! just today his preschool teacher told me that she just loves him and thinks he's the cutest. and he is! when he isn't being naughty. haha the other day my mom took him on the heber creeper train ride for his birthday, and he told her "i used to fight with my brother finn, but i don't fight with him much anymore because i love my finnjamin." lol and it's true, they fight a lot less. probably because he's directed all his negative energy toward gus! those two fight non-stop. all sam has to do is look at gus and gus starts screaming and running away. haha sibling rivalry at its finest. the two of them have a very sweet relationship too, and those rare times when they aren't fighting over toys (mostly trains) they are playing so cute together.
sam started preschool this fall, and he is really loving it. it wasn't quite as easy to get him to go as it was with finn. in finn's two years of preschool, and this year with kindergarten, never once has it been a fight to get him to go. sam fought going for about a month. it was never a huge struggle, but when it got time to get dressed in the morning, he'd say he didn't want to go, and wouldn't change his mind until i was walking out the door to take finn to school. but he absolutely loves it when he's there. he has his best little friend, kohen, in school with him, plus i have a couple other friends who have their kids in the same school. his teacher is miss nikole (who taught finn his first year, and then one day a week his second year) and she is the sweetest lady on the planet. when i go to pick him up, i just have to shake my head and laugh because sam is always in everyone's face, waving his bag or hugging them or trying to tackle them. we've recently picked up on the fact that his love language is touch...quite obvious now that we've figured it out because he always (ALWAYS) touching everyone.
over the last month or so, i've really seen some changes and improvements in him (not counting this last week, when he's been a complete nightmare). the other day at dinner finn wanted some more bacon, but it was all gone, and without being asked or told or hinted in the slightest, sam (who is bacon's number one fan) tore off half of his piece of bacon and said, "here you go finn." again, one of those sweet sweet moments when all the hard work of the past 4 years seems to be paying off. he is very sweet, and very loving when he wants to be. but i think that's the key when it comes to sam - it all has to be his idea. he's not one to be forced, i think he gets that from his dad. and his mom. haha no wonder he's so stubborn.
Gus
gus is two and the cutest little man you'll ever meet. i told lance the other day that we hit the trifecta with gus - he's the best looking, has the cutest personality and is the most even-tempered. he is just so easy. most of the time! haha he's definitely dabbling in that terrible two stuff, and i have a feeling it's bound to get worse once baby brother arrives. for now though, i just cannot get enough of my sweet gus. he is talking so much these days, and it melts my heart. my favorite thing he says is "thank you," which really doesn't even sound much like thank you haha but i just love that he's so polite. yesterday when we were eating breakfast he said "go away, sam!" and even though i probably shouldn't encourage it, i couldn't help but laugh. he is so silly, and so so sweet. when he is sad, or frustrated, or after he's gotten in trouble, he'll come over to me and say "hug, hug" and reach his arms up for a hug. he's very sensitive (maybe my most sensitive) and completely shuts down when he gets in trouble. he hangs his head low and gives you a nasty stare down, letting you know you hurt his feelings. he loves both of his big brothers so much, and follows them around the house, wanting to do whatever they are doing. he can definitely hold his own with them (with sam i should say) and is by far our toughest kid.
he is addicted as ever to his binki. heaven help us when we have to take that thing away! he still requests a bottle for nap and bedtime. heaven help us there too. and he looooooves his giraffe and two blankets. he has recently become obsessed with cars and trucks and mostly trains. yes, we have two train lovers in the family! so far it hasn't been a huge problem, although sam does occasionally get pretty possessive over a track he's building or one of his trains. gus loves to ride around the garage on the wiggle car, and is the biggest fan of the side-by-side. i think he's got adventure in his blood, which is terrifying but so cute.
we moved him to a big-boy bed the beginning of august, and he has done so incredibly well in it. he was by far our easiest kid to transition to a big-boy bed, but why would that surprise me? he's the easiest with everything. i am so, sooooo attached to him, and love every moment i get to spend with him. i'm actually getting really nervous and sad at the thought of how everything is bound to change once ollie gets here. speaking of ollie, if i ask him if he's excited to be a big brother and meet ollie, he either points to his belly lol or comes over to me, lifts my shirt up and kisses my belly. i can't wait to see him as a big brother. i have a feeling he'll be really sweet, just because that is his nature. but i guess it could go the other way and he might just hate him. haha
lance is as busy as ever with work, which is such a blessing. sometimes a huge pain haha but i try not to be too negative about it. we have been so fortunate to have all this work, and i sure appreciate how hard he works to provide such a nice life for us. he loves his kids more than anything, and is the best dad i could have ever hoped for. i think part of it is because he's a kid-at-heart himself, which makes him so fun to be around. if ever i start to feel sad about the fact that we'll never have a daughter, i just think about what an awesome boy dad lance is, and it all makes sense to me why we only have boys. he loves taking them camping and fishing, he likes to show them how to fix stuff. he loves watching movies with them and taking them to movies. he's so hands-on and for that i'm so grateful.
this pregnancy has been my toughest yet. physically, mentally and emotionally. i don't know if it is because i'm older, or because i have three kids, or because it's my fourth pregnancy. or maybe i just haven't taken care of myself the way i should? i have been so tired, and so stressed, and so grumpy and awful to be around, i'm sure. i'm sure because lance tells me haha. needless to say, i am ready to meet this babe in my belly. i hope he knows how much i love him. how much we all love him. and how grateful we are that he chose to come to us. t-12 days till we get to meet the little fella. lets hope it goes by fast!
xoxo
becky
Thursday, October 27, 2016
Sunday, May 29, 2016
..my preschool graduate..
on wednesday, may 25th, my first baby became a preschool graduate. words cannot express what i have been feeling, unless you were to use every emotion in the dictionary! i am blaming some of it on those blasted pregnancy hormones because, i swear, i've been waaaaay more emotional this pregnancy than any other. however, i am an emotional person to begin with, so i know that pregnancy is only partly to blame.
in the weeks and months leading up to finn's last day of school, i found myself in tears almost every time i picked him up. just hearing him talk about what he's been learning, how much fun he's had with all his little friends, the ways he responds to and respect his teachers...i just couldn't bear the thought that soon that would all be over for him. he has learned and grown so incredibly much these past two years at candyapple cove. it's always interesting to look back in retrospect, and see how things just work out the way they are supposed to. i actually had finn registered for a different preschool - one that came highly recommended and seemed like a great fit. we had paid the registration fee and everything, but then my friend laura told me about a school close to her home (and not far from the school finn was already registered at) and for some reason i just felt more inclined to go with that school. finn would have a friend in class (minnie), i liked the schedule better and so i paid another registration fee and signed him up for candyapple cove.
fall rolled around and i was days away from having gus but as you might recall, i kept that little breech turd inside (jokes, jokes) because the thought of missing my first baby's first day of preschool was out of the question. that first day was just as joyful and devastating as i thought it would be - your first little bird, out of the nest and learning how to fly. finn loved preschool from the very first day, which was somewhat surprising to me. i thought he'd have a little more separation anxiety, but he never did. his teacher, miss nikole, is probably the sweetest lady on the planet. one of those people who you can just see is fulfilling her calling in life and doing a tremendous job at it. finn was a little stinker at the time when it came to social skills. we're talking he didn't have any. he's always been a pretty mild mannered dude, but he just didn't know how to share, didn't understand why we can't push and hit and spit. he wasn't horrible or anything, but i'd catch him doing any number of those things and try and discipline him and would just fall up short. it's like i couldn't get through to him, and really i think he just plain didn't understand. about halfway through the year, one day when miss nikole was putting him in the car she said, "i just love finn so much, he is so much fun. he was one of my harder kids in the beginning but he's turned into one of the best." that made my mama heart swell with so much pride, and i felt like i had my good-natured kid back on track. god bless preschool teachers!
well that first year ended, but it wasn't sad because we both knew he would be coming back in the fall. most of the same kids would be in his class again, he'd have miss nikole as his teacher on wednesdays and miss tammy as his teacher on monday's and friday's. those last few weeks of summer were long ones for him, i could tell he was so ready and so excited to get back to school. and truth be told, i was so ready for him to go back. we just function better with a schedule to follow, know what i mean? also, two kids is easier than three, especially when it comes to grocery shopping! ;)
finn loved preschool just as much this year, maybe even more. that first year it seemed like they focused mostly on social skills, as they should and i'm so glad they did because that was the main reason i had him in preschool. this year they did a lot of learning. learning numbers and letters and shapes and colors. i don't think i even realized how much he has been learning until the graduation program! he knows most of the alphabet in sign language, he can recognize every single one of his letters and knows the sounds they make. he can recite poems and sing songs. he knows the pledge of allegiance. he's just become one smart kid i tell ya! such a relief, because about a year ago i bought alphabet flash cards and spent at least 30 minutes one day trying to teach him a, b, & c. well after that 30 minutes i held up the letter a, asked him what it was and he said 4. this happened multiple times over the course of a few days, at which point i gave up! haha it seemed hopeless, yet so frustrating. I've come to realize that all kids learn at their own pace, and i think some kids need someone other than mom teaching them certain things. whatever miss tammy and miss nikole do, works, or at least it worked for finn, and i will always be so indebted to them for that.
about a week before his last day, i decided a graduation bbq with this classmates was in order. somehow it all came together just in time - i had invitations made and printed so they could be passed out the friday before graduation. i spent my weekend crafting up a storm - mostly to keep myself busy so i wouldn't scare my family with my hysterical crying! sad, but true. i got a lot of rsvp's and people offering to help with the food and all systems were a go. the monday before school ended, i was a total wreck! cried every second of the day, lost it when miss tammy put him in the car that day, bawled my eyes out to ellie when she came to chat while the kids were getting buckled. like i said, i know some of it has got to be pregnancy hormones, but really i think i'd have been a mess either way! i kept telling everyone who would listen that i was mostly just sad that he won't be going to school with most of the same kids next year. besides krew, the rest of his little buds will all be going to different schools. and i know he will make new friends. i know that he doesn't understand and might not even remember these same kids come fall and the start of kindergarten. do i remember most of the kids i went to preschool with? no. but i know finn, and i know that first day of school this fall, he will get in the car and tell me that evan and sam and ronan and minnie and charlotte and nora aren't in his class. and that thought just breaks my heart. these kids have had such a huge impact on his life, just by being themselves and being his friend, and i'm so thankful to them and their parents. thank goodness sam is going to candyapple cove next year, otherwise saying goodbye to his teachers would have been a whole other level of heartbreak for me to deal with.
wednesday the 25th rolled around and i held it together for the most part. finn got all dressed up for school, and was wondering why he had to wear church clothes to school! haha i told him we dress nice for important occasions, and this definitely qualified as important. when miss tammy came and got him from the car, she said, "oh my gosh finn, you look so handsome!" and after she shut the door, i could hear her gushing even more over what a little gentlemen he was. that was hard for me to drive away, knowing it was the last time her or miss nikole would ever come and get my handsome finn from the car.
an hour later we were back and ready to watch their program. it was the cutest thing i have ever seen, and the videos i have from it are ones i will cherish forever. finn knew all the words to all the poems, and all the words and actions to all the songs. he performed them better than i ever imagined he would, and was so confident and proud sitting up there. tears were definitely rolling, but i wasn't nearly as hysterical as i thought i would be. i realized that the main reason i have been so emotional is because i am just so dang proud of how much he's grown and the little person he is and is becoming. he is a good kid, with a good heart and a good head on his shoulders. laura told me that one day someone was being mean to minnie, and finn stuck up for her so now she tells laura she loves finn and is going to marry him. haha so i asked finn about it, and he said that there's a kid in class who is sometimes mean to him, or evan, or minnie, and so finn will say to that kid "stop being mean." he kind of just told me this story nonchalantly, like he has no idea what an amazing quality that is, but i know, and i hope he will always be that way, sticking up for the underdog. he really just is at such a fun age right now - smart, willing to help, for the most part nice to his little brothers. it will be hard for me to send him off to kindergarten next year, because i sort of just want to keep him all to myself. i'm scared for what the world will do to my innocent, kind-hearted, good-natured little boy. i guess i just have to hope that what he's learned so far, and the qualities i continue to try and instill in him, will be enough to get him through all the bad stuff that is out there.
i know there is a special place in heaven reserved for preschool teachers (the good ones, anyway) and i know miss nikole and miss tammy will be there. they are amazing women who i know have loved my child like their own, and taken better care of him than i could have ever asked for or expected. thank goodness sam will benefit from their wisdom and love for hopefully the next two years. and fingers crossed gus and ollie will follow their big brothers footsteps and become candyapple cove graduates one day.
to my finn, i love you more than you will ever know! you are one amazing kiddo and although it breaks my heart a little, i can't wait to see all the places you'll go because i know you will go far.
in the weeks and months leading up to finn's last day of school, i found myself in tears almost every time i picked him up. just hearing him talk about what he's been learning, how much fun he's had with all his little friends, the ways he responds to and respect his teachers...i just couldn't bear the thought that soon that would all be over for him. he has learned and grown so incredibly much these past two years at candyapple cove. it's always interesting to look back in retrospect, and see how things just work out the way they are supposed to. i actually had finn registered for a different preschool - one that came highly recommended and seemed like a great fit. we had paid the registration fee and everything, but then my friend laura told me about a school close to her home (and not far from the school finn was already registered at) and for some reason i just felt more inclined to go with that school. finn would have a friend in class (minnie), i liked the schedule better and so i paid another registration fee and signed him up for candyapple cove.
fall rolled around and i was days away from having gus but as you might recall, i kept that little breech turd inside (jokes, jokes) because the thought of missing my first baby's first day of preschool was out of the question. that first day was just as joyful and devastating as i thought it would be - your first little bird, out of the nest and learning how to fly. finn loved preschool from the very first day, which was somewhat surprising to me. i thought he'd have a little more separation anxiety, but he never did. his teacher, miss nikole, is probably the sweetest lady on the planet. one of those people who you can just see is fulfilling her calling in life and doing a tremendous job at it. finn was a little stinker at the time when it came to social skills. we're talking he didn't have any. he's always been a pretty mild mannered dude, but he just didn't know how to share, didn't understand why we can't push and hit and spit. he wasn't horrible or anything, but i'd catch him doing any number of those things and try and discipline him and would just fall up short. it's like i couldn't get through to him, and really i think he just plain didn't understand. about halfway through the year, one day when miss nikole was putting him in the car she said, "i just love finn so much, he is so much fun. he was one of my harder kids in the beginning but he's turned into one of the best." that made my mama heart swell with so much pride, and i felt like i had my good-natured kid back on track. god bless preschool teachers!
well that first year ended, but it wasn't sad because we both knew he would be coming back in the fall. most of the same kids would be in his class again, he'd have miss nikole as his teacher on wednesdays and miss tammy as his teacher on monday's and friday's. those last few weeks of summer were long ones for him, i could tell he was so ready and so excited to get back to school. and truth be told, i was so ready for him to go back. we just function better with a schedule to follow, know what i mean? also, two kids is easier than three, especially when it comes to grocery shopping! ;)
finn loved preschool just as much this year, maybe even more. that first year it seemed like they focused mostly on social skills, as they should and i'm so glad they did because that was the main reason i had him in preschool. this year they did a lot of learning. learning numbers and letters and shapes and colors. i don't think i even realized how much he has been learning until the graduation program! he knows most of the alphabet in sign language, he can recognize every single one of his letters and knows the sounds they make. he can recite poems and sing songs. he knows the pledge of allegiance. he's just become one smart kid i tell ya! such a relief, because about a year ago i bought alphabet flash cards and spent at least 30 minutes one day trying to teach him a, b, & c. well after that 30 minutes i held up the letter a, asked him what it was and he said 4. this happened multiple times over the course of a few days, at which point i gave up! haha it seemed hopeless, yet so frustrating. I've come to realize that all kids learn at their own pace, and i think some kids need someone other than mom teaching them certain things. whatever miss tammy and miss nikole do, works, or at least it worked for finn, and i will always be so indebted to them for that.
about a week before his last day, i decided a graduation bbq with this classmates was in order. somehow it all came together just in time - i had invitations made and printed so they could be passed out the friday before graduation. i spent my weekend crafting up a storm - mostly to keep myself busy so i wouldn't scare my family with my hysterical crying! sad, but true. i got a lot of rsvp's and people offering to help with the food and all systems were a go. the monday before school ended, i was a total wreck! cried every second of the day, lost it when miss tammy put him in the car that day, bawled my eyes out to ellie when she came to chat while the kids were getting buckled. like i said, i know some of it has got to be pregnancy hormones, but really i think i'd have been a mess either way! i kept telling everyone who would listen that i was mostly just sad that he won't be going to school with most of the same kids next year. besides krew, the rest of his little buds will all be going to different schools. and i know he will make new friends. i know that he doesn't understand and might not even remember these same kids come fall and the start of kindergarten. do i remember most of the kids i went to preschool with? no. but i know finn, and i know that first day of school this fall, he will get in the car and tell me that evan and sam and ronan and minnie and charlotte and nora aren't in his class. and that thought just breaks my heart. these kids have had such a huge impact on his life, just by being themselves and being his friend, and i'm so thankful to them and their parents. thank goodness sam is going to candyapple cove next year, otherwise saying goodbye to his teachers would have been a whole other level of heartbreak for me to deal with.
wednesday the 25th rolled around and i held it together for the most part. finn got all dressed up for school, and was wondering why he had to wear church clothes to school! haha i told him we dress nice for important occasions, and this definitely qualified as important. when miss tammy came and got him from the car, she said, "oh my gosh finn, you look so handsome!" and after she shut the door, i could hear her gushing even more over what a little gentlemen he was. that was hard for me to drive away, knowing it was the last time her or miss nikole would ever come and get my handsome finn from the car.
an hour later we were back and ready to watch their program. it was the cutest thing i have ever seen, and the videos i have from it are ones i will cherish forever. finn knew all the words to all the poems, and all the words and actions to all the songs. he performed them better than i ever imagined he would, and was so confident and proud sitting up there. tears were definitely rolling, but i wasn't nearly as hysterical as i thought i would be. i realized that the main reason i have been so emotional is because i am just so dang proud of how much he's grown and the little person he is and is becoming. he is a good kid, with a good heart and a good head on his shoulders. laura told me that one day someone was being mean to minnie, and finn stuck up for her so now she tells laura she loves finn and is going to marry him. haha so i asked finn about it, and he said that there's a kid in class who is sometimes mean to him, or evan, or minnie, and so finn will say to that kid "stop being mean." he kind of just told me this story nonchalantly, like he has no idea what an amazing quality that is, but i know, and i hope he will always be that way, sticking up for the underdog. he really just is at such a fun age right now - smart, willing to help, for the most part nice to his little brothers. it will be hard for me to send him off to kindergarten next year, because i sort of just want to keep him all to myself. i'm scared for what the world will do to my innocent, kind-hearted, good-natured little boy. i guess i just have to hope that what he's learned so far, and the qualities i continue to try and instill in him, will be enough to get him through all the bad stuff that is out there.
i know there is a special place in heaven reserved for preschool teachers (the good ones, anyway) and i know miss nikole and miss tammy will be there. they are amazing women who i know have loved my child like their own, and taken better care of him than i could have ever asked for or expected. thank goodness sam will benefit from their wisdom and love for hopefully the next two years. and fingers crossed gus and ollie will follow their big brothers footsteps and become candyapple cove graduates one day.
to my finn, i love you more than you will ever know! you are one amazing kiddo and although it breaks my heart a little, i can't wait to see all the places you'll go because i know you will go far.
Monday, December 28, 2015
..christmas 2015..
christmas has come and gone, and what a wonderful one it was! every year i think to myself, "i don't think this christmas can be topped," and every year it is just as wonderful and magical, if not more so, than the last.
it was a busy month as usual, with all the different parties we hosted and attended. throw our anniversary into the mix, some birthday parties, all the shopping that must be done and bam, christmas is here before you know it! its always a little sad to me how fast it passes, and i think from here on out, rather than feeling embarrassed or ashamed for putting my tree and decorations up mid-november, i'm just going to embrace it and stretch out this favorite holiday of mine for as long as possible.
christmas eve is my favorite. dare i say even more so than christmas morning? it's a close one, maybe a tie? i think the anticipation of the big day is what makes it so fun. celeste took some pictures of us that morning, since zac and shrimp were in town. lance has been so busy with work that he wasn't able to make it, but maybe celeste can photoshop him in? haha after that we all did some christmas shopping, prepped for the annual family party at grandma and grandpa hansen's house and headed on up for my favorite party of the season. that particular party is christmas to me. some of my fondest childhood memories are from playing with my cousins christmas eve, singing christmas carols, listening to my grandpa read luke 2, taking group pictures, then getting in the car and heading home, the anticipation of the next day bursting at the seams, opening our one present when we got home, which was always pajamas. nothing has really changed after all these years - that's the way we still do it, same order and everything.
after getting the kids in bed christmas eve, we got to work putting things together. really all there was to do was put the legs on sam's train table and then put the train together, which didn't take nearly as long as i thought it would. lance went to bed around 11 (party pooper!) but i was up much later, getting everything all ready. i wrapped almost everything that needed to be wrapped a few days prior, which definitely saved a lot of time. santa doesn't wrap presents in our house, which makes things a thousand times easier. i think one of my favorite responsibilities as a parent is staging christmas, and i am certain it is because of how magical my mom made christmas for us growing up. in fact, i know that is the reason i still find this time of year so magical, more so than most others i'd guess. my mom just did such a fabulous job and i am finding myself appreciating it even more so the older my kids get. man was a i lucky! anyway, after the stockings were stuffed and the presents set out just so, i took a hundred pictures then went to bed!
i woke up early christmas morning, panicked because i forgot to start the dishwasher the night before haha so i went out to do that then caught a few more z's before just getting out of bed and waiting for the kids to wake up. they've been waking up pretty early lately, around 7:30, but they slept in till about 8 or so. finn's reaction wasn't what i thought it would be. i thought he would be immediately psyched about his reindeer, but he seemed pretty overwhelmed and didn't give us much of a reaction. sam came down and said his usual, "good morning everybody!" then went straight to his train table where he literally was 90% of the rest of the day. i knew he'd love it, but i think even i underestimated just how much! after a half hour or so, he came and sat down by me, and with his sweetest little high-pitched voice said, "fank you fo ma twain mommy." melt! its those things that make the day so magical and make all the stress and money spent and sleepless nights of the previous weeks worth it.
it didn't take finn long to warm up to his toys. he was so excited when he realized santa brought everything on his list: a yoyo, ties, a reindeer and a skeleton toy. one of the toys i was most excited for finn to open was the "big Zurg" from disneyland. he wanted it when we were there last month, but we talked him into getting the smaller version. a few weeks later he mentioned how maybe he could get the big zurg when he turned 6, haha and he never said a word about it again. i knew he'd be surprised so i paid double on ebay to buy it (it can't be found in any stores because it is a disneyland toy, so lame!) but his reaction was priceless! while ripping the wrapping paper off he quickly figured out what it was, and said "a big zurg!" then sam came over and said, "wow!" with such awe and wonder. that was one of my favorite parts of the morning.
the day was spent lounging in our pajamas, cooking and eating, watching movies and taking it easy. normally we go to the osborne's for breakfast, but vickie had surgery a few days before so they rescheduled their annual breakfast for new years day. although we missed everyone we didn't get to see, it was such a nice relaxing day, spent with most of the people we love dearly. my dad spent christmas eve with us, but left early christmas morning (like we are talking at 9 o'clock, mid-way thru opening presents haha).
i'm so grateful for the testimony i have of our savior, jesus christ. of his birth and extraordinary life, his atonement and resurrection and the pathway he has forged for us to return to live with him again someday. in all the hustle and bustle of the month of december, the true meaning of the season can often be over-looked, and i can only pray that as my kids get older, i will strive to focus on the true meaning, so that they, too, can develop a testimony of their own of the wonderful man we are fortunate enough to call our brother.
merry christmas, to one and all!
it was a busy month as usual, with all the different parties we hosted and attended. throw our anniversary into the mix, some birthday parties, all the shopping that must be done and bam, christmas is here before you know it! its always a little sad to me how fast it passes, and i think from here on out, rather than feeling embarrassed or ashamed for putting my tree and decorations up mid-november, i'm just going to embrace it and stretch out this favorite holiday of mine for as long as possible.
christmas eve is my favorite. dare i say even more so than christmas morning? it's a close one, maybe a tie? i think the anticipation of the big day is what makes it so fun. celeste took some pictures of us that morning, since zac and shrimp were in town. lance has been so busy with work that he wasn't able to make it, but maybe celeste can photoshop him in? haha after that we all did some christmas shopping, prepped for the annual family party at grandma and grandpa hansen's house and headed on up for my favorite party of the season. that particular party is christmas to me. some of my fondest childhood memories are from playing with my cousins christmas eve, singing christmas carols, listening to my grandpa read luke 2, taking group pictures, then getting in the car and heading home, the anticipation of the next day bursting at the seams, opening our one present when we got home, which was always pajamas. nothing has really changed after all these years - that's the way we still do it, same order and everything.
after getting the kids in bed christmas eve, we got to work putting things together. really all there was to do was put the legs on sam's train table and then put the train together, which didn't take nearly as long as i thought it would. lance went to bed around 11 (party pooper!) but i was up much later, getting everything all ready. i wrapped almost everything that needed to be wrapped a few days prior, which definitely saved a lot of time. santa doesn't wrap presents in our house, which makes things a thousand times easier. i think one of my favorite responsibilities as a parent is staging christmas, and i am certain it is because of how magical my mom made christmas for us growing up. in fact, i know that is the reason i still find this time of year so magical, more so than most others i'd guess. my mom just did such a fabulous job and i am finding myself appreciating it even more so the older my kids get. man was a i lucky! anyway, after the stockings were stuffed and the presents set out just so, i took a hundred pictures then went to bed!
i woke up early christmas morning, panicked because i forgot to start the dishwasher the night before haha so i went out to do that then caught a few more z's before just getting out of bed and waiting for the kids to wake up. they've been waking up pretty early lately, around 7:30, but they slept in till about 8 or so. finn's reaction wasn't what i thought it would be. i thought he would be immediately psyched about his reindeer, but he seemed pretty overwhelmed and didn't give us much of a reaction. sam came down and said his usual, "good morning everybody!" then went straight to his train table where he literally was 90% of the rest of the day. i knew he'd love it, but i think even i underestimated just how much! after a half hour or so, he came and sat down by me, and with his sweetest little high-pitched voice said, "fank you fo ma twain mommy." melt! its those things that make the day so magical and make all the stress and money spent and sleepless nights of the previous weeks worth it.
it didn't take finn long to warm up to his toys. he was so excited when he realized santa brought everything on his list: a yoyo, ties, a reindeer and a skeleton toy. one of the toys i was most excited for finn to open was the "big Zurg" from disneyland. he wanted it when we were there last month, but we talked him into getting the smaller version. a few weeks later he mentioned how maybe he could get the big zurg when he turned 6, haha and he never said a word about it again. i knew he'd be surprised so i paid double on ebay to buy it (it can't be found in any stores because it is a disneyland toy, so lame!) but his reaction was priceless! while ripping the wrapping paper off he quickly figured out what it was, and said "a big zurg!" then sam came over and said, "wow!" with such awe and wonder. that was one of my favorite parts of the morning.
the day was spent lounging in our pajamas, cooking and eating, watching movies and taking it easy. normally we go to the osborne's for breakfast, but vickie had surgery a few days before so they rescheduled their annual breakfast for new years day. although we missed everyone we didn't get to see, it was such a nice relaxing day, spent with most of the people we love dearly. my dad spent christmas eve with us, but left early christmas morning (like we are talking at 9 o'clock, mid-way thru opening presents haha).
i'm so grateful for the testimony i have of our savior, jesus christ. of his birth and extraordinary life, his atonement and resurrection and the pathway he has forged for us to return to live with him again someday. in all the hustle and bustle of the month of december, the true meaning of the season can often be over-looked, and i can only pray that as my kids get older, i will strive to focus on the true meaning, so that they, too, can develop a testimony of their own of the wonderful man we are fortunate enough to call our brother.
merry christmas, to one and all!
Monday, September 7, 2015
..happy birthday, gus..
my dear baby gus,
how can it be that you are ONE year old? this past year flew by in a blink of an eye. the way they all seem to do. it's like they say, the days are long but the years are short. and that has never been more true for me than it was this year.
you bring such a tremendous amount of joy into my life, sweet boy. i feel so incredibly attached to you, in a way that i haven't been to your big brothers. of course i love all three of you so equally, but my love for each of you is different, most likely because you are all so different. such individual spirits who my soul just recognizes and loves so unconditionally. when you are in pain, i am in pain. when you are happy, my heart is happy. i think that line from les mis rings so true and resonates now more than it ever has before in my life - "to love another person is to see the face of god." i don't think i've ever felt closer to my savior and heavenly father than i have in this past year. relying on their tender mercies to pick me up when times got tough. getting even just the slightest glimpse of what they must feel, watching down on us in this mortal experience. being a mama ain't always easy, but has always been my greatest joy and accomplishment in life.
generally speaking, you are a very happy, laid-back, easy-going babe. you prefer mom, but love dad, grandma and your brothers. you freak out (and i mean freak out) if anyone with dark dark hair gets in your face. it is kind of comical, but i also feel bad for you and the person who was just trying to say hi. ;) you could laugh at sam all day long (as long as he's not toughing you) , and when finn isn't mauling you with hugs & kisses, he brings a calming presence to you. you watch your older brothers and are so fascinated by them and i know in a matter of time you will be one of them. the three musketeers. it makes my heart happy just thinking about it.
you have just barely (like just in the past couple weeks) taken a real liking to solid foods and are just getting to the point where you'll try table foods. you love your bottle, maybe a little too much?! haha i switched you to cow's milk a couple weeks ago, and while you downed it like it was nobody's business, it has caused some terrible constipation. it has been heart-breaking to watch you struggle to poo, especially considering you were the child that had a blowout every freakin' day for 10 months! the other day you were just laying on the floor with your head down, trying so so hard to push it out. it broke my heart. we've tried giving you juice, feeding you lots of apples, and finally resorted to miralax. it has been helping a little, but i can still tell that you are uncomfortable. hopefully your body adjusts soon.
you still don't have any teeth, but i think your bottom two are getting ready to cut through. they say that the longer they take to come in, the healthier the teeth are, so i'm hoping you'll have some dang good teeth.
you look just like finn did when he was a baby, but slightly different, if that makes any sense?! i think your features are a bit more petite than his, and you are quite a bit smaller than either of your big brothers were, so maybe you'll just be a mini-finn you're whole life? ;)
we had a big ol' birthday party for you tonight up at the church park. you had so many friends and family members there to support you and celebrate you on your big day! you are one lucky and loved little guy, mister gus, and i hope as you grow you'll never forget that.
i am so grateful for the opportunity i've been given to be your mom. you make me happier than you could ever know, and i don't know what we'd ever do without you.
happy birthday, baby boy!
love,
mom
how can it be that you are ONE year old? this past year flew by in a blink of an eye. the way they all seem to do. it's like they say, the days are long but the years are short. and that has never been more true for me than it was this year.
you bring such a tremendous amount of joy into my life, sweet boy. i feel so incredibly attached to you, in a way that i haven't been to your big brothers. of course i love all three of you so equally, but my love for each of you is different, most likely because you are all so different. such individual spirits who my soul just recognizes and loves so unconditionally. when you are in pain, i am in pain. when you are happy, my heart is happy. i think that line from les mis rings so true and resonates now more than it ever has before in my life - "to love another person is to see the face of god." i don't think i've ever felt closer to my savior and heavenly father than i have in this past year. relying on their tender mercies to pick me up when times got tough. getting even just the slightest glimpse of what they must feel, watching down on us in this mortal experience. being a mama ain't always easy, but has always been my greatest joy and accomplishment in life.
generally speaking, you are a very happy, laid-back, easy-going babe. you prefer mom, but love dad, grandma and your brothers. you freak out (and i mean freak out) if anyone with dark dark hair gets in your face. it is kind of comical, but i also feel bad for you and the person who was just trying to say hi. ;) you could laugh at sam all day long (as long as he's not toughing you) , and when finn isn't mauling you with hugs & kisses, he brings a calming presence to you. you watch your older brothers and are so fascinated by them and i know in a matter of time you will be one of them. the three musketeers. it makes my heart happy just thinking about it.
you have just barely (like just in the past couple weeks) taken a real liking to solid foods and are just getting to the point where you'll try table foods. you love your bottle, maybe a little too much?! haha i switched you to cow's milk a couple weeks ago, and while you downed it like it was nobody's business, it has caused some terrible constipation. it has been heart-breaking to watch you struggle to poo, especially considering you were the child that had a blowout every freakin' day for 10 months! the other day you were just laying on the floor with your head down, trying so so hard to push it out. it broke my heart. we've tried giving you juice, feeding you lots of apples, and finally resorted to miralax. it has been helping a little, but i can still tell that you are uncomfortable. hopefully your body adjusts soon.
you still don't have any teeth, but i think your bottom two are getting ready to cut through. they say that the longer they take to come in, the healthier the teeth are, so i'm hoping you'll have some dang good teeth.
you look just like finn did when he was a baby, but slightly different, if that makes any sense?! i think your features are a bit more petite than his, and you are quite a bit smaller than either of your big brothers were, so maybe you'll just be a mini-finn you're whole life? ;)
we had a big ol' birthday party for you tonight up at the church park. you had so many friends and family members there to support you and celebrate you on your big day! you are one lucky and loved little guy, mister gus, and i hope as you grow you'll never forget that.
i am so grateful for the opportunity i've been given to be your mom. you make me happier than you could ever know, and i don't know what we'd ever do without you.
happy birthday, baby boy!
love,
mom
Tuesday, June 2, 2015
..sammy boy..
dear sammy boy,
from the very beginning i could tell that you were going to be full of personality, and i was right! you are such a fun little boy, and you remind me so much of your dad. you are very friendly, always saying hi to strangers at the mall and the grocery store. you have a little spark in your eye and the cutest little smile that totally draws people in. whenever we have friends over or are in a big group-type setting, you tend to just hang back and observe. i don't know if it's because there aren't tons of kids your age or maybe it is just the age you're at, but you don't really play with the other kids just yet. the other day we had a bbq and we were out around the fire-pit getting ready to roast 'mallows. i said "heeeyy sam, how ya doin'?" and in your cute voice you said "nuffing." the others got a kick outta that, and someone commented on how they never hear you talk! it was sort of surprising to me because i feel like you never stop talking, but then i thought about it, and when we are with lots of people, you are kinda quiet. it was an interesting observation. everyone thinks you are just the sweetest little dude. around others, you totally are, but when it's just us, you have quite the feisty side too. ;)
you idolize your big brother, and it warms my heart to no end. every day after dropping finn off at preschool we would go run errands, and about 30 minutes into it you would say "i want finn." if you wake up in the morning or from your nap before him, you head straight downstairs to wake him up. and if we are at home playing or at the park or splash pad playing with other kids and he leaves your side, you sadly come up to me and say "where's my finnjamin?" you are his little shadow and sidekick and it is just the cutest thing ever. since the day i found out you were a boy i had high hopes of you and finn being best friends. things seemed a little iffy there for a while (as in the past year and a half! haha) but slowly and surely i think we are headed in the right direction. you guys still butt heads, rough-house and fight plenty, but i can see how much love you have for each other and it makes me the happiest mama!
you were a little unsure of your little brother when he was first born, but it didn't take you long to warm up to him. your personality can be a little overwhelming for gus i think, and you still aren't quite aware of how much bigger you are than him, or how rough you sometimes act haha, but gus' face lights up whenever he sees you, and that is another thing that just melts me. sometimes when we are in the car and finn isn't there, you and gus will talk to each other and play little games with each other, and it is so dang cute. i hope that all three of you will be the best of friends someday.
you are very rough and tough on the outside, but inside you are as sweet and sensitive as they come. when you do something wrong (like hit finn or somehow accidentally hurt gus or the dogs) and i get mad at you, your lip quivers and you try with all your might to fight the tears from spilling out. there are times i've asked you to apologize to finn for something, and you can barely muster the strength to even look at him because you feel so bad. it is heartwarming, to say the least, to see that underneath that tough exterior you are just a sweet little teddy bear.
your favorite person on the planet is grandma and whenever she is over, you don't leave her side except for bed. there have been times when she has spent the weekend with us, and whenever she goes back home, it is quite the rude awakening for you! you love her so dang much, it is adorable. and i don't blame you, she is pretty great.
you have the blondest hair and cute little brown eyes, a round face and the sweetest dimples. you are solid from head to toe, which must be due to the fact that you're a bottomless pit. you love food and will eat just about anything most days. you don't like having your picture taken, which is so sad because you are pretty photogenic, so i don't have many great pictures of you because you usually turn your head away any time i try to take a picture. little stinker! you have the cutest voice on the planet! it is so high-pitched and singsongy. i seriously love hearing you talk (when you aren't whining ;)). you are obsessed with bubbles - we have probably gone though about $50 worth of bubbles in the past month (which is saying something because bubbles are cheap!). a few funny, bubble-related stories:
***a while back we were hanging out in the cul-de-sac with the clayton's and whitney's. you were blowing bubbles out on the lawn, when all the sudden the sprinklers turned on. instead of freaking out (like most kids or adults probably would have done) you just moved out of the way and kept blowing your bubbles. i didn't see it but celeste relayed the story to me and she could not get over how cute it was!
***a few weeks ago we were playing outside, and every time anyone is outside, people start to congregate. i can't recall everyone that was there, but i remember sadie and adam came over. you were sitting on the driveway, happily blowing your bubbles when sadie came and sat next to you. i didn't see exactly how it happened, but sadie must have taken your bubbles from you and started pouring them out on the driveway. you stood up, started shaking, turned beet-red and screamed at the top of your lungs "NOOOOOOO SADIE!!!" then you ran around and hid behind dad's truck and started crying! it was the funniest/saddest/cutest thing i have ever seen! all you need to be happy in life is a container of bubbles. sadly we were all out of them, but later that night i went to the store and bought you tons of bubbles, because i felt so bad.
i think you are heading out of the terrible-2 phase...i hope so anyway! whenever i think that to myself, you seem to digress again haha so maybe i shouldn't verbalize that? no, i can definitely tell that you are responding to discipline and behaving better. you are easier to take to dinner and in public, so i'd call that progress. i can only hope you have been a terrible 2-year-old and that you won't be a terrible 3-year-old, because i'm not sure if i'll survive. you have given me a run for my money, dear boy, but i'm pretty sure you will your whole life. ;) you bring me so much joy, but a lot of anxiety too haha. i wouldn't want you any other way. you are brave, smart, tough, sweet, silly, dirty, 100% boy, and one of my favorite people on the planet. i have so much fun watching you grow and figure out the world, and as crazy as you sometimes make me, you bring me so much pride and fill my heart with so much love.
i love you more than you'll ever know, my sweet samuel james.
love,
mom
mr golden sun
i can hardly believe that it is already june, which means the year is half-way over. what?! where does the time go? the more kids i have and the older i get, the more literal that saying becomes, "the days are along but the years are short." my oh my, what a harsh reality that is. i don't know if it is normal how sad i get at the thought that my kids are growing up so dang fast, but one thing is for sure, i wouldn't trade this time in my life for anything. life is crazy, but so so good.
summer officially started for us last week, but we stayed in the whole week - didn't do one single fun activity. part of it was due to the rain (which has since subsided for the time being - hallelujah!) but part of it was also me just being lazy. i thrive on a schedule and am a total creature of habit so i absolutely loved having the schedule of preschool these past nine months. i didn't quite know what to do with myself last week without that structure, even just those two days a week! with the help of the sun, it has been easier to get out and about this week (it is only tuesday, but i have high hopes for the rest of our week ;)) and i already feel such a difference in my attitude and outlook. lets hope the sun decides to stay. that rain was sure getting depressing!
yesterday we met shanelle and ellie and their kids at the splash pad out in foxboro. it was a little too windy for our liking, but the kids had so much fun running around and playing together. finn and krew play soooo well together. their personalities totally balance each other out and i love it. they can get kinda rough and mean at times, but i think they are really good together. finn just loves miss sadie and she holds her own and plays well with the boys. it sure is fun watching your kids make friends. sammy boy kept getting lost at the splash pad, it was kinda sad haha. every time i saw him wandering in the wrong direction i'd yell for him and wave him over. each time he came over crying, saying "where's my finnjamin?" that's what he's been calling finn lately and it sorta melts me! i can totally see how much they love each other, which has been a nice change of pace because for a while there i wondered if they'd ever be friends. they still fight plenty, but they definitely love each other.
sweet little gus, who is so easy-going and laid back, was not a fan of the splash pad. i don't know if it was the wind, or if he was just tired or what, but he was fussy the whole time we were there which is very un-like him. oh well, you win some you lose some, eh?
sam slept in his swim trunks last night and yesterday i bought finn some new ones, so i had him try them on this morning, and once he put them on he didn't want to take them off. so instead of going grocery shopping this morning like we should have, i decided to take them to city creek. i had to return something, and i also needed to buy finn some sandals or water shoes, so i figured i'd do that and then let them play in the fountains for a bit. they loved it so we'll chalk today up to a win also!
it's crazy what a little vitamin d can do to boost your spirits so here's to hoping that mr golden sun sticks around for a while!
summer officially started for us last week, but we stayed in the whole week - didn't do one single fun activity. part of it was due to the rain (which has since subsided for the time being - hallelujah!) but part of it was also me just being lazy. i thrive on a schedule and am a total creature of habit so i absolutely loved having the schedule of preschool these past nine months. i didn't quite know what to do with myself last week without that structure, even just those two days a week! with the help of the sun, it has been easier to get out and about this week (it is only tuesday, but i have high hopes for the rest of our week ;)) and i already feel such a difference in my attitude and outlook. lets hope the sun decides to stay. that rain was sure getting depressing!
yesterday we met shanelle and ellie and their kids at the splash pad out in foxboro. it was a little too windy for our liking, but the kids had so much fun running around and playing together. finn and krew play soooo well together. their personalities totally balance each other out and i love it. they can get kinda rough and mean at times, but i think they are really good together. finn just loves miss sadie and she holds her own and plays well with the boys. it sure is fun watching your kids make friends. sammy boy kept getting lost at the splash pad, it was kinda sad haha. every time i saw him wandering in the wrong direction i'd yell for him and wave him over. each time he came over crying, saying "where's my finnjamin?" that's what he's been calling finn lately and it sorta melts me! i can totally see how much they love each other, which has been a nice change of pace because for a while there i wondered if they'd ever be friends. they still fight plenty, but they definitely love each other.
sweet little gus, who is so easy-going and laid back, was not a fan of the splash pad. i don't know if it was the wind, or if he was just tired or what, but he was fussy the whole time we were there which is very un-like him. oh well, you win some you lose some, eh?
sam slept in his swim trunks last night and yesterday i bought finn some new ones, so i had him try them on this morning, and once he put them on he didn't want to take them off. so instead of going grocery shopping this morning like we should have, i decided to take them to city creek. i had to return something, and i also needed to buy finn some sandals or water shoes, so i figured i'd do that and then let them play in the fountains for a bit. they loved it so we'll chalk today up to a win also!
it's crazy what a little vitamin d can do to boost your spirits so here's to hoping that mr golden sun sticks around for a while!
Thursday, May 7, 2015
..eight months..
my dear sweet gus,
how is it that you are already eight months old? i'm sitting here, wondering where the time has gone and i simply cannot believe it. they say time passes fast when you're having fun, and i can attest to that ten-fold, because since becoming a mom, never has each day and month and year passed by so quickly.
you are still the laid-back, happy, easy-going babe you've been since day one. such an easy little thing, in almost every way possible. sure, you get fussy and there are times when i cannot figure out what is quite wrong with you. but for the most part you, my dear, are as chill as they come. i'm so grateful to my heavenly father for sending you. you are just what i need, and a lot of times you are the only thing that keeps me sane.
one of my favorite things about our family right now is watching you with your big brothers. you adore them. your eyes light up and you get the biggest smile on your face when you hear them or when you see them walking into a room. you sit next to finn in the car, and you just stare at him and smile. i know this because almost every day, while we are out and about, finn says to me, "mom, gus is smiling at me right now!" he absolutely loves it, and so do i. you make us all smile, simply by being you. i have a feeling it will always be this way. i hope so at least. even sammy boy, who can be quite rough and tough, has this way with you. he is as gentle as he gets, and although he can't quite verbally communicate it, i know he loves you more than you'll ever know. boy, what a joy it is to watch my babies become friends with one another. i don't think anything has ever brought me quite as much joy.
some things i want to remember about you as an 8-month-old:
-you are finally starting to roll around! you've been able to roll for about 4 months now, but you haven't seemed to like it until very recently. you still don't love being on your belly, which i'm hoping means it'll be a month or two longer before you crawl. :) not sure i'm ready for a mobile baby just yet.
-you have slobber dripping down your chin and chest all.day.long.! i assume it is from teething, but there are no visible teeth quite yet, so who knows! i feel sort of bad though because your little chest always has a rash on it because it is always wet.
-you are starting to enjoy solids more, but i am still pretty bad about feeding them to you. i really need to make a better effort.
-you can hold your own bottle now, which is quite nice. it allows me to get stuff done, knowing that you are entertained for a bit. i still need to make it a point to hold you while you drink it, at least once or twice a day, because i know that will be something i'll miss in the years to come - holding my babies while they eat.
-you're very grabby - always grabbing whatever is in your reach. especially my hair. ouch! ;)
-still blow out of your diapers, at least once a day. a day!! what exactly the reason is, i'll never know. i have tried different brands, different sizes and nothing seems to work. if its not coming out the back, its coming out your legs or the front. it is insane!
-a few weeks ago we left you with our babysitter for the second time in your life, but this was the first time it was a success! she said you didn't cry once, which i was so grateful for. since then, she's babysat you two more times and you've done pretty well both times. this is such a milestone (for both of us!) because i honestly didn't think i'd every be able to leave you. i have this strong, unexplainable and probably somewhat unhealthy attachment to you. i think it has something to do with the anxiety i've developed since you've been born. i don't like leaving you...with anyone really. but i've gotten better at it, and even left you overnight with dad last week. and i'm proud to say i didn't worry once. what a blessing it was!
-you can patty-cake (clap) by yourself and it is the cutest thing ever!
-you also started waving. i've tried catching it on video but you get all shy and stop whenever i pull my phone out. which is actually kind of uncharacteristic because you normally light up whenever you see me recording you or taking pictures. part of me thinks you might be my little performer. i hope so. :)
my dear gus, you really are as sweet as they come, as cute as they come, and the biggest blessing to our family. as sad as it is to watch you (all my babies really) growing up so dang fast, i can't help but beam with joy and pride at each stage. there really is nothing better in this world than being a mom, and i'll never know why i am so blessed or got so lucky with you and your brothers, but i do know that i'm one lucky gal. thanks for all the love and joy you bring, my sweet babe.
love,
mom
how is it that you are already eight months old? i'm sitting here, wondering where the time has gone and i simply cannot believe it. they say time passes fast when you're having fun, and i can attest to that ten-fold, because since becoming a mom, never has each day and month and year passed by so quickly.
you are still the laid-back, happy, easy-going babe you've been since day one. such an easy little thing, in almost every way possible. sure, you get fussy and there are times when i cannot figure out what is quite wrong with you. but for the most part you, my dear, are as chill as they come. i'm so grateful to my heavenly father for sending you. you are just what i need, and a lot of times you are the only thing that keeps me sane.
one of my favorite things about our family right now is watching you with your big brothers. you adore them. your eyes light up and you get the biggest smile on your face when you hear them or when you see them walking into a room. you sit next to finn in the car, and you just stare at him and smile. i know this because almost every day, while we are out and about, finn says to me, "mom, gus is smiling at me right now!" he absolutely loves it, and so do i. you make us all smile, simply by being you. i have a feeling it will always be this way. i hope so at least. even sammy boy, who can be quite rough and tough, has this way with you. he is as gentle as he gets, and although he can't quite verbally communicate it, i know he loves you more than you'll ever know. boy, what a joy it is to watch my babies become friends with one another. i don't think anything has ever brought me quite as much joy.
some things i want to remember about you as an 8-month-old:
-you are finally starting to roll around! you've been able to roll for about 4 months now, but you haven't seemed to like it until very recently. you still don't love being on your belly, which i'm hoping means it'll be a month or two longer before you crawl. :) not sure i'm ready for a mobile baby just yet.
-you have slobber dripping down your chin and chest all.day.long.! i assume it is from teething, but there are no visible teeth quite yet, so who knows! i feel sort of bad though because your little chest always has a rash on it because it is always wet.
-you are starting to enjoy solids more, but i am still pretty bad about feeding them to you. i really need to make a better effort.
-you can hold your own bottle now, which is quite nice. it allows me to get stuff done, knowing that you are entertained for a bit. i still need to make it a point to hold you while you drink it, at least once or twice a day, because i know that will be something i'll miss in the years to come - holding my babies while they eat.
-you're very grabby - always grabbing whatever is in your reach. especially my hair. ouch! ;)
-still blow out of your diapers, at least once a day. a day!! what exactly the reason is, i'll never know. i have tried different brands, different sizes and nothing seems to work. if its not coming out the back, its coming out your legs or the front. it is insane!
-a few weeks ago we left you with our babysitter for the second time in your life, but this was the first time it was a success! she said you didn't cry once, which i was so grateful for. since then, she's babysat you two more times and you've done pretty well both times. this is such a milestone (for both of us!) because i honestly didn't think i'd every be able to leave you. i have this strong, unexplainable and probably somewhat unhealthy attachment to you. i think it has something to do with the anxiety i've developed since you've been born. i don't like leaving you...with anyone really. but i've gotten better at it, and even left you overnight with dad last week. and i'm proud to say i didn't worry once. what a blessing it was!
-you can patty-cake (clap) by yourself and it is the cutest thing ever!
-you also started waving. i've tried catching it on video but you get all shy and stop whenever i pull my phone out. which is actually kind of uncharacteristic because you normally light up whenever you see me recording you or taking pictures. part of me thinks you might be my little performer. i hope so. :)
my dear gus, you really are as sweet as they come, as cute as they come, and the biggest blessing to our family. as sad as it is to watch you (all my babies really) growing up so dang fast, i can't help but beam with joy and pride at each stage. there really is nothing better in this world than being a mom, and i'll never know why i am so blessed or got so lucky with you and your brothers, but i do know that i'm one lucky gal. thanks for all the love and joy you bring, my sweet babe.
love,
mom
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