..breakfast with santa..

dear finn and sam,

this year my aunt vickie decided to start a new tradition - breakfast with santa! so many restaurants these days offer the option of meeting santa while eating breakfast, but since vickie has an "in" with santa, she decided, "why go out to breakfast with santa when santa will come to you?!"

eating with cousins. reindeer pancakes.
watching santa when he came in. sam and cousin claire.

breakfast was very delicious and festive, and we had so much fun visiting with our cousins. finn, you didn't  like santa very much, but we had fun watching you with him. ;)

sam and santa. isabelle not liking santa. all the kids (well, most the kids) with santa. 

i hope this is a tradition that will continue in the years to come.

love,
mom

..sammy boy is two months old..

dear baby sam,

today you turned two months old! i've said this to your big bro pretty much since the day he was born, but time sure flies. it goes by even faster these days, now that i'm tryin' to keep up with two! we've had some ups and downs, but i think we've finally started to figure life out as a family of six and it just keeps getting better.

your second month on earth was much better than your first month here. i blame myself for the first month. it's not that it was bad or anything, i just made the huge mistake of not trying to figure you out better, so for the first month you were overly-tired, which resulted in fussiness. i wouldn't even say that you were too terribly fussy, you just seemed uncomfortable most of the time. i thought the discomfort you were so obviously experiencing was due to gas. turns out i just wasn't doing the things you needed. i feel so guilty, and SO bad for you that you went that whole month on very little sleep, no schedule or routine, probably as uncomfortable as all get out. seriously, mother of the year (or at least of the month) definitely didn't go to me! ;)

good news is, we figured you out (or i did, anyway). i read a few pages (seriously, just a few) of secrets of the baby whisperer, and it basically changed both our lives. i'm just sorry i didn't read it the day we brought you home. i had the book in my nightstand since before finn was born, but for some reason i just never pulled it out. lazy me. the part of the book that helped us was the test she has the reader take about what kind of baby you have. i took the test, we determined that you are a "touchy baby," i did the things she recommends for a touchy baby and voila! seriously, it worked like a charm in no less than a day. i kept thinking to myself, "this has to be a fluke, there is no way that changing those few simple things could change your life, and mine," but here we are, about a month later and you are a 100% different baby. you are happy and content and so easy to be around as long as we do what you need. and i mean hello, isn't that my job as a mom - to figure you out and do what you need? yes, it is. :)

as a touchy baby, you are very sensitive to external stimuli. you are not a fan of bright, blinding lights, you get easily distracted by the tv, loud music, strangers all up in your grill. ;) you like to nap in your crib, swaddled, with the shutters closed and a white noise machine on. you are particularly fond of the "ocean" sound on your sound machine. probably because the crashing waves sound like what you heard for 9 months in my belly. :) for the first whole month of your life, i thought you weren't a very good sleeper (day or night), but it was my fault, because i had you napping in the pack-n-play, on my chest, in the swing, bouncer, carseat. you actually do like sleeping in your carseat, but the rest....nada! you just like the comfort of your crib, and i can't say i blame you! i sleep best in my bed, why wouldn't you?! needless to say, you'd be awake for hours at a time during the day (like sometimes, 4+ hours!) and i always wondered why you weren't sleepy! turns out you were extremely sleepy. i think you spent month two catching up on all that missed sleep, because now you sleep a ton! we have to watch your cues very carefully, and if we do, you go down for naps and bed easily, but if we miss them it takes some rocking and/or a bottle to get ya down. no biggie though, at least we now know that you are, indeed, a good sleeper. :)

you are extremely patient with your big brother, and i have a feeling you're gonna be a tough little guy. let's face it, you're going to have to be with finn running around! if i turn my head for two seconds he is laying on top of you, giving you all sorts of loves. one thing is for sure - finn loves you more than you will ever know! it melts my heart to watch him with you, and i pray each day that you will grow to love him as much as he loves you. :)

a few things about you as a two-month-old:

-you have a very strong neck, and hold your head up incredibly well for your age. finn's neck was never this strong at 2 months.
-you are very alert and happy just after you've been fed, as long as you've been fed enough! i swear you could eat all day long!
-you smiled early on (a little before 4 weeks) and have smiled every day since. you love the sound of mom, dad and grandma cindy's voice and smile whenever we talk to you! we love it.
-you eat every 3 hours. first you nurse, then you drink between 2 and 4 oz of formula. apparently my milk isn't enough for you! i was certain that you'd be off-the-charts-HUGE since you eat so much, but you were just slightly above average. that was a relief for me to hear, since i was convinced you were on the path to obesity as a 2-month-old. haha ;)
-after eating, you like to stay awake for 30-45 minutes and play, then it's back to bed.
-you've been sleeping between 6 and 8 hours at night, on average. mama sure  does love those long stretches! does wonders for us both.
-we finally took you back to the hospital for your hearing test. you passed, but it took us a looooong time to get you to pass. haha nothing at all wrong with your ears, you were just wide awake, hungry, had a blow-out, etc and those are not ideal conditions for that test. it was a pain, i won't lie, i'm just relieved you passed!
-you like looking at lights (christmas lights, the rope lighting in our house) as long as it's not too bright. you are not a fan of the sun! i think you must have your dad's sensitive eyes.
-you like to lay on your playmat during play time, but only for 15 minutes or so. if we go too much longer than that you start to get fussy. you aren't a fan of the swing or bouncer.
-you are incredibly portable, as long as you've been fed. we rarely hear a peep out of you when you're in your carseat!
-you aren't a fan of big crowds. i think unfamiliar faces must make you nervous/scare you.
-you like to know that i'm nearby (or dad, if he's the one taking care of you). if we leave you on your playmat and you can't hear/see/sense we are nearby, you panic. i kinda like this...it means you like us! ;)
-i think you might be a momma's boy, but who knows! i would love it if you were.

we went to the doctor yesterday and you are doing incredibly well. as i mentioned above, i was certain you were going to be huge. in fact, i've been stressing about it for weeks now! seriously, you eat so much, and some of your clothes are even too small. turns out all that worrying was for nothing though! here are your stats:

height: 23 3/4 inches (80th percentile)
weight: 12 pounds (59th percentile)
head circ.: 38 1/2 cm (18th percentile)

i'm thinking that the reason some of your clothes don't fit is because you're so tall! it was a relief for me to hear that you aren't, in fact, on the road to childhood obesity. ;) jk.

you started your immunizations yesterday. it's no fun, i know, but it is a necessary part of keeping you healthy (we hope so, anyway!). you weren't a fan of those darn shots. screamed bloody murder!! it was so sad to hear. you calmed down shortly after, though, and did pretty well the rest of the day, considering what had been done. you did scream a few different times throughout the evening, but not for too long. breaks my heart to see you in so much pain. :(

anyway mr. samuel james, i just wan't you to know how happy i am that you are part of our family. i'm sure you sometimes wonder in that tiny baby head, "why did i agree to come to this family?? they are crazy! what is up with this finn character, always laying on top of me and kissing me all the time? and this person...what's her name? mom? yeah, why did it take her a month to figure out what i do and don't like? some mother she is! and dad...is that his name? i guess he's alright. he usually just smiles at me and gives me food to keep my happy. i like him okay." haha i'm sure that's what you're thinking most of the time! but even though you have only been a part of our family for 2 months, i can't imagine life - or our family - without you! you have made being a mother of 2 humans surprisingly easy, and for that, i say thank you and i love you. i love you more than you'll ever know dear boy.

love,
mom

..finn @ 20 months..

dear finn,

oh mr mr, where to even begin with you?! haha you just get funnier and more entertaining by the day little one. each day with you is a new adventure, and (most days!) i love it! some days i'll admit, i do want to admit one of us to an insane asylum, but those days are few and far between. ;)

you are still my sweet, easy-going little man, but i have a feeling the terrible 2's are headed our way, and i can't say i'm looking forward to them. i am looking forward to you growing and learning, i'm just not looking forward to the tantrums. you've given us a little glimpse of them, and they ain't pretty! haha in all honesty though, you are still pretty dang easy, and i hope you'll stay that way. you do throw fits (short ones, at least) when you don't get what you want, but hello, have you met your mom and dad? we're the same haha, so it's probably just in your genes. ;)

here are some things i want to remember about you at 20 months:
-you have started to exert your independence more and more. you don't like us helping you with things, such as putting shoes on, occasionally putting clothes on. certain toys you don't like us touching or helping you with. you like to do things on your own. good for you! (frustrating for us at times).
-you love wearing shoes. it's so funny! this is the source of many a tantrum though, because i don't like you wearing your shoes in my bed or on our couches, so when i won't help you put them on or make you take them off, you flip your lid. sometimes these tantrums last like 10 minutes! holy moly, get over it already! haha
-you are a climber, and climb on anything and everything. thankfully you haven't figured out how to climb out of your crib.....yet, anyway.
-you are extremely affectionate with everyone, but especially with your baby brother! you love him so, soooo much. it melts my heart.
-as stated above, you love sam sooooo much. i can't take my eyes off of the two of you, ever, because the second i do you are laying on top of him, giving him kiss after kiss after kiss. if he is in his carseat you basically just get right in his face and kiss him for minutes at a time. it's so sweet. if he has a bottle nearby, you'll grab it and start feeding him! dead serious. you're the best big bro.
-you like to give "bones" and high fives. you especially love giving bones to sam. sam has his hands in fists much of the time, so you'll come up to him, grab his arm and have his fist pound yours. it's so funny!
-your top k-9 teeth FINALLY cut through! hallelujah. this has been happening since you were 15 months old. i can't wait for them to come all the way through, because you have been lots fussier than normal and have been sleeping terrible! you wake up crying in the middle of the night almost every night, and are awake for the day at 6! no bueno for your tired mom and dad.
-you're not as picky as you used to be. you'll try most things, whereas you used to not even try food we'd give you! sometimes though, you'll chew food for hours. literally. it's really weird. haha but at least you'll try it, eh?!
-you like playing with other kids. you still need to learn how to share and not hit, but i'm sure those are normal behaviors for someone your age. your best friend is locke, and you've been playing with him a bit more lately. you also like playing with krew, lucy, max and brecken. i can tell you idolize boys, especially older ones. it's fun for me to watch! i can't wait til sammy boy is older and can play with you. you'll be best friends i think. :)
-you understand so much more than i ever thought you did, and i'm loving it! you'll do frequent favors for mom and dad, such as turning the bouncer off, throwing garbage away, fetching things off the table/nightstand for me, such as my phone or mug of water. i love it!
-you are talking more each day, but it's still not totally understandable. we're making progress though, which is a good thing.
-you love our christmas decorations, but especially the lights on the trees and garlands. you've always been fascinated with lights! you've been surprisingly good about not touching the ornaments.

i love you more and more each day, if that's possible. you have me rolling on the ground most of the time. sometimes i definitely want to pull my hair out because of you, but i'm pretty sure that's just part of the job. you sure are a cutie and i love you more than you'll ever know!

love,
mom

..thankful..

my dear sweet boys,

happy thanksgiving! sammy boy's first, and finn's second. i think as the two of you get older, you'll come to appreciate and love this holiday as much as i do. any excuse to stuff yourself silly, right? just kidding. it really is so nice to take a break for a day. to be surrounded by the people you love most and ponder all the blessings you've been given. what's even better, is that the whole month of november, in a way, is dedicated to being thankful. i mean, i know that being thankful for what we have is something we should carry in our hearts every day of the year, but it is nice to have a day, and a month, to think on it even more than we normally do.

it seems that each year i get older, i have more and more to be thankful for. i suppose it's just a natural thing, as every year here on earth brings more blessings than the year before. bear with me as i list some of the things i'm most thankful for from this past year:

*getting pregnant so easily for the second time. i have a few very dear friends who are/have been struggling with infertility. i can't claim to know what they are going through, but my heart aches for each of them. it is something that i don't understand, since the desire for a loving, married couple to bring a baby into the world is such a righteous one. i can't understand why heavnely father would deny them that. i know that there is a purpose and a reason for everything, and i am not doubting heavenly father and his plan, i guess i just don't understand. i know we all have trials and i suppose that not being able to get pregnant is some people trial here on this earth, which makes me ever so thankful to have been blessed with getting pregnant so easily both times.
*an uncomplicated pregnancy.
*having a doctor that i trust and have come to love. seriously though, i love dr. barton and kind of want to have another baby soon so that i can keep going to him once a month. ;) just kidding. kind of.
*our trip to hawaii. it was so fun to spend an entire week in paradise with the people i love most. hopefully we'll get to go back with sam, too, one day.
*all the work that dad has been blessed with. i know that this comes straight from heaven, and i'm forever thankful to heavenly father for providing dad with a steady workflow in such an unsteady economy. i'm thankful to dad for being willing to work so hard to provide for us, and for the opportunity it gives me to stay at home with you guys all day.
*all of our temporal blessings....our house, our cars, the clothes in our closets, the food in our pantry, the many decorations that make our house a home. i know we don't need any of these things to be happy (well, maybe food) but they sure do make our lives easier and i'm thankful for that.
*the safe arrival of you, mr. samuel james. obviously this was our biggest blessing this year! i'm so thankful for the love and joy your bring to my life, and to our family. at this point in time you complete us, and i don't know what we'd do without you.
*good health and safety (for the most part) for our family. we had some scares this year (finn's tooth accident, the time i found finn out in the middle of the road, childbirth round 2, my appendicitis) but we made it through and i'm so grateful for that. i know we have guardian angels keeping watch.

these are just a few. i'm really so thankful for so much more, but because i'm running short on time i'll leave it at that for now. :)

this year on instagram, i decided to post a picture of something i was thankful for every day leading up to thanksgiving. i hashtagged them #monthofthanks and #gratefulgram. i'm really glad i did this, and i think i'll do it every year, and as soon as you're both old enough i'll encourage you to do it as well. even on the worst of days - like the day i was stuck in the hospital due to an appendicitis - there is always something to be thankful for, and i think it is important to never forget that. :)

grateful for my boys. grateful for date night, even if there are tag-alongs. ;) grateful boys napped at same time so i could get ready.
grateful finn is old enough for nursery. grateful for my mom. grateful for privilege of voting.
grateful for modern medicine. grateful for whit. grateful for dad. 

grateful for visiting teaching. grateful for sammy boy. grateful for a reliable car to drive.
grateful to be married, in the temple. grateful for duke and claus, my furry children. grateful that finn is a good bro.
grateful for the opportunity to bear children. grateful for the baby whisperer. grateful for our college friends.

grateful to sam for sleeping well so i had energy to put christmas decorations up. grateful to be a stay-at-home-mom.
grateful for sam's birth photos. happy thanksgiving 2012, from the powell's. 

we celebrated thanksgiving today at the osborne's house. we enjoyed a delicious meal of turkey, ham, mashed potatoes and gravy, cranberry sauce, stuffing, rolls and let's not forget delicious pies for dessert! it was nice to be surrounded by those we love, catching up on each other's lives as we stuffed ourselves full of food. afterwards we stopped by the mackie's to visit with the powell side of the family for a while. most of the people there had never met you, mr. sam, and were so excited to finally see you!

then we came home and dipped into a food coma. haha what is it about thanksgiving that makes everyone so tired?? something in the turkey, i know. but really i didn't even eat that much turkey and i was still so exhausted. oh yeah, i have a newborn, how could i forget?! jk. it was a very happy holiday indeed, and i'm so grateful that we had dad all to ourselves for one whole day. that is rare! i'm mostly thankful for the joy and love you boys have brought to my heart. a mother's love is something that no one can understand until they experience it for themselves. i'm so beyond grateful for the gift i've been given to take care of each of you, and for heavenly father's trust in me to do it. we definitely have our hard days, but it is the best, most rewarding thing i've ever experienced. i'm thankful to you two for helping me through it, and for being the best little boys a mom could ever ask for.

love,
mom

..a little setback..

my dear boys,

the first tuesday of every november is election day here in the united states. by the time you actually read this blog (if you ever do, let's be honest!) you'll probably be familiar with the history and reasons for election day, so i'll spare you the history lesson. the key facts are: this year was a big one! it was a presidential election year, and mitt romney (r) and barack obama (incumbent, d) were the candidates.

well, i took a big interest in the elections this year, starting clear back in january when the republican party started holding primaries. i'm a huge fan of mitt romney, and i started to get really excited and passionate about things when it became clear that he would most likely be the republican nominee. my reasons for supporting him weren't just because he's good looking and mormon (haha, i kid, i kid), but i really felt that this was the right man to get our economy back on track. his experiences in life, as a missionary, stake president, business man, etc..., in my humble opinion, made him much more qualified to turn our country around in the direction we need to be headed.

well, november 6th - election day - arrived, and i was a bundle of nerves the whole day. i was so excited that this day was finally here, and felt pretty confident that my man, mitt, had a decent chance of winning. we of course took a little stroll down to the city building to cast our vote (i know our vote doesn't matter a ton, since we live in such a conservative state, but that is beside the point. we vote based on principle) and for the rest of the day me and finn wore our "i voted" stickers with pride (sorry sam, they didn't give you a sticker). well, the polls started to close back east, so i settled down on the couch (after attending to both your needs, of course) to watch as the numbers came in.

the night drew on, and i started getting realllllly nervous for mitt. at one point i had to stop watching, i was just to nervous! we took a break and ran some errands with dad, and resumed our position on the couch a couple hours later. well, it started becoming apparent that barack obama would most likely win, and i started to feel sick to my stomach. i am not a fan of him for many reasons, and my heart just felt sad that america was picking the wrong person to lead our country at such a crucial time in its history. every time that stupid little chime would come on and diane sawyer would announce, "we have results from [another state]," (or whatever the crap she said) my heart sunk a little more. then she made the announcement that obama had the electoral votes needed to win, and dead serious, i got the biggest pit in my stomach. i became really frustrated and angry, and said some things on facebook i probably shouldn't have. ;) i was literally just so sick and so sad.

dad decided that i needed something to take my mind off the election results, so he suggested we watch that week's episode of dexter. i obliged. i fell asleep on the recliner halfway through, and when i woke up i was still so sick to my stomach. stupid barack obama and those damn democrats! haha i really thought they were the cause of my sore tummy. so i went up to bed with a glass of water, and thought all i needed was a few good hours of sleep to feel better. boy, was i wrong!

i woke up around 2 a.m. to feed you, mr samuel. you weren't awake quite yet, but i sure was! i was sooooooo sick. my stomach hurt so badly, and i was just sure i probably had the flu. i laid in bed, hoping that at some point my tummy would start to feel better, but it just seemed to be getting worse. luckily sam kept sleeping, because i was in no condition to feed him. i got out of bed and went to the bathroom. i felt so nauseas, like i needed to throw up, but i tried and couldn't. i couldn't go #2 either (sorry for tmi!). so i laid on the floor in the bathroom (tells you how sick i musta felt, for me to do something that gross!) and decided to say a prayer. so i knelt down, bent over of course, and prayed to my heavenly father to help me feel better and/or to know what was wrong with me. i knew something was probably wrong at this point, and knew that whatever it was, i needed to get it taken care of because i was in no position to take care of you two kiddos when you woke up the next day.

within seconds of asking for heavenly father's help, the answer came to me. like the scriptures say, the spirit spoke to me in a still small voice, and it said, "appendicitis." i had known people who had had appendicitis' before, and they all said it starts out as the worst stomach ache you have ever experienced. so i googled "symptoms of appendicitis" and researched it for a while. i was still a little skeptical (silly mama for doubting the spirits whisperings) because my stomach ache was right where my belly button is, and everything was saying the ache would be on the lower right side of your abdomen, where your appendix is. but then i found stuff that said it would start out in the middle of your abdomen, so after reading that i knew i probably was having an appendicitis.

i called grandma cindy, crying of course, and told her what was going on. i knew i needed someone i could trust to be with you two, since i needed dad to be with me. she came down, and off dad and i went to the hospital. while we were waiting for grandma to get to our house, i laid on the floor of our bedroom, curled over in the fetal position. i was seriously in more pain than i've ever been in!

i decided we should go to lds hospital. lakeview hospital is way closer, but i've heard bad things about it so i didn't trust going there. the people at lds treated me so well, and it didn't take long for me to realize we made the right decision in going there.

when we got to the ER, there was only one other person in front of me, and they were admitting her right as i walked in. thank goodness it was the middle of the night (3:30 am, technically) because i have always heard horror stories about waits in the ER. we were admitted right away, which was such a huge blessing, and i got some pain meds shortly after, which was an even bigger blessing! thank you morphine!!! almost instant relief. the doctor came in to talk to me, and recommended doing a CT scan to hopefully get some answers. we did, and sure enough, appendicitis. as weird as it may sound, i was relieved! it's not that i necessarily wanted to have surgery (i mean, hello, i had a baby 3 1/2 weeks ago) but i was glad to know that there was a clear-cut answer and a clear-cut prognosis: remove the appendix, deal with a couple days? weeks? of pain and be done with it. they scheduled surgery right away (it was about 6 am by this point) and that was that.

grandma cindy stayed home with you two because dad could not miss work. go figure something like this had to happen when dad was busier than busy. life always seems to happen that way, thanks murphy! ;) my aunt heidi came to the hospital to check on me when i woke up from the anesthesia, which i'll be forever thankful for. the worst part of this whole experience, in my opinion, was the 2 or 3 hours after waking up from surgery. oh my heavens! i pray that neither of you will ever have to experience any type of surgery or undergo any type of anesthesia (except maybe when you have to get your wisdom teeth removed?) bc it was awful! i can't even describe what was going through my head, it was just a little bit scary. i was like stuck in these two different places - reality and drug land, perhaps? - and i just felt loopy and weird. as soon as it wore off i felt much better. my tummy hurt, obviously, but nothing i couldn't handle with the help of a little medicine. :)

as soon as the doctors and nurses found out i had a baby 3 1/2 weeks prior to this experience, they were immediately concerned and felt bad for me. the surgeon who performed the appendectomy said that normally it's an out-patient procedure, meaning you don't have to stay at the hospital over night, but because i had just given birth and my body was recovering from that, she wanted me to stay overnight. in all honesty, i think she just wanted me to have a little break from taking care of you little rugrats! ;) her name was heidi jackson, and i really really liked her. i liked all the nurses and people who took care of my during my short stay, and am thankful to them for making this miserable experience a little less miserable.

it was amazing to me how much i missed you two while i was at the hospital. i mean, yeah you're my kids and i love you more than words could describe, but i had only been away from you for mere hours when i started to miss you both like crazy!! i even started crying. i'm sure my raging hormones have something to do with it, but i think that goes to show how deep a mother's love is. even through all the pain and discomfort i was experiencing, i longed to be home with my sweet little boys. :)

grandma cindy couldn't miss work two days in a row, so the next morning my aunt heidi came over to watch you two until i got home from the hospital. i'm so thankful to everyone who helped me during this entire experience, while i was in the hospital and also throughout my recovery. shawna ford (our neighbor) took finn one afternoon, which was such a huge help, even though it broke my heart to see his sad face as they drove away! my visiting teaching partner brought dinner to us one night, and my sweet visiting teacher, lindsey nielsen, brought dinner another night. grandma cindy came down after work nearly every day for a week, so that i could get some rest, and daddy-o was so great about helping around the house and with finn.

although i wish this whole thing never happened, i'm grateful for the things i learned. i learned to let people help when they offer, especially when you need it. i never really needed help after giving birth to either of you boys, i always felt really great shortly after. this was different though. i was in pain, and there were lots of things i couldn't, or shouldn't, do (such as lift finn). so i let dad and grandma cindy do the heavy lifting for a good two weeks, and i know that helped. i also learned so much about the power of prayer, and that our heavenly father will always be there for us when we need him. i'm so thankful to him for answering my prayer that night, and so quickly too, because i'm not sure what would have happened if we had waited much longer to go to the hospital.

and now that it's all said and done, i actually kind of like telling people the story - that i thought my stomach ache was due to barack obama being re-elected. haha, there is still a part of me that thinks he really is the reason for my appendicitis. all that stress! just kidding. it has been a couple weeks though, and i finally am starting to regain some strength in my abdomen. i am feeling much better, thank goodness! and just in the knick of time too, with the holidays right around the corner. now we can get back into the swing of things. :)

love,
mom

..a month, already?!..

dear sammy boy,

today you are one month old! the past month has been a whirlwind of experiences and emotions for all of us. besides the lack of sleep we have all experienced, we have survived, and are starting to figure things out as a family of six. :)

you have been a bit unpredictable when it comes to a routine, up until just very recently. i blame this all on myself, for not doing everything i could to get to know you better. i made the grave mistake of comparing you to your older brother, forgetting that you are two completely different little people, so obviously you wouldn't be alike! but a few days ago i started reading, "secrets of the baby whisperer," and a few of her tips have already completely changed things around here, for the better! let's hope they stick.

the things i have learned about you in the past month (and some in just the past few days) are........you are extremely patient with your older brother. he is pretty obsessed with you, and basically just likes to kiss, hug and hold you all day long, and although he is trying to be sweet, he is sometimes a bit rough but you totally put up with it. you are never satisfied after nursing. like ever! you always want more about 45 minutes later. so we have started supplementing with formula...between one and three oz at each feed. you like to be swaddled for naps and bedtime. you like to be held. you sleep best in your crib, with the blinds closed, and a sound machine on. you eat every 2 1/2 to 3 hours, as long as we feed you enough at each feeding. :) you have more poopy diapers than any baby i've ever heard of! your diaper always has poop or pee or both when i go to change it! you are also the gassiest baby i've ever heard of!! you fart all day long and it it smelly, too! you could go toe to toe with your dad in a farting competition, i'm sure of it! ;) you usually give us a good 4-5 hour stretch of sleep at night. you are very easy to take places because all you do is sleep! you are already a smiley little dude, and we love it! you smiled for the first time on purpose just a few days ago...for grandma cindy, while i was in the hospital. started cooing at about three weeks. you don't do it a ton, but grandma and i both noticed it at different times. you get overstimulated pretty easily. you don't love the bouncer, swing, or playmat yet. you like them only for very short periods of time. you like your carseat and crib, but do not like your pack-n-play. you have the world's cutest sad face! breaks my heart into a million pieces, every single time! i also love the face you make right after you've woken up and are stretching....you arch your back, bring your hands up by your cheeks and puff your cheeks up. it's to die for! you've been on tons of outings, pretty much since you were 5 days old. most of them were to the mall haha. you still sleep for a majority of the day.....probably catching up on all the sleep you missed for the first three weeks of your life, before the baby whisperer helped me figure you out. according to her, you are a "touchy" baby. as long as we do what you like, though, you are extremely easy and happy!

we sure love you more than you could ever know, baby sam. in just one short month you have changed all of our lives....for the better of course! i don't know what we would do without you, and i can't wait to get to know you better and watch you grow and develop in the months to come!

love,
mom

..finn is 19 months..

dear baby finn,

in some ways it is weird to call you "baby," because ever since sam was born you seem so old to me! but you are my first little baby, and i have a feeling i will always kind of think of you as my baby. :)

wow, what a month it has been! so many changes for everyone, not the least of which is you! but you have handled all of them exceptionally well. i don't know why i'd be surprised...hello, you are my dream boy and have been since day one.

you are the best big brother i could have ever hoped you'd be to baby sam. you love him, and that is very obvious to anyone who knows our family. all day long, all you want to do is be by him, near him, kissing him, holding him, loving on him. it is enough to melt a momma's heart, i tell ya! i mean, i had a feeling you'd be a really sweet big brother, because that is just your nature. i'm not sure i knew just how sweet you'd be though. sammy boy is lucky to have you, that's for sure.

this past month you turned back into your dreamy baby self. the month before was a bit rough (september). maybe it was because your accident, or maybe september just isn't your month, because now that i think about it, last september was a difficult one too! ha, weird. anyway, you started napping regularly again - 2 hours, twice a day, one in the morning around 9 or 10, the other in the afternoon around 3. you have been sleeping at least 11 hours at night again. none of this waking up at 5 or 6 shenanigans, like you did last month! hallelujah! basically you are just back to yourself. i know this was no accident, i can feel the lord's hand in our lives. he knew we'd need you this way in order to survive the first month with a newborn, and i am forever grateful for that. :)

you still aren't talking as much as i'd thought/hoped you'd be, but all in good time, i'm sure. you definitely are getting closer, i can tell. your gibberish is becoming more pronounced....we can kind of understand what you are saying, even if other people can't. i feel like you've learned how to communicate more effectively, which i'm grateful for, and i'm certain that within the next few months you will start talking up a storm!

my favorite time of year is upon us. i know it will be one of the best holiday seasons yet, with you and your little brother a part of our family. love you more than you'll ever know, sweet boy!

love,
mom